Microwave Popcorn: A Recipe for Disaster?
Check out the numerous safety warnings on this bag of Natural Simply Salted Orville Redenbacher microwave popcorn (and these are only the English instructions)! There is hardly an inch of real estate left on the bag to print the actual name of the product...
1. This is a highly experimental process. We're not really sure what will happen when you place this bag in the microwave.
2. Slapping yourself silly on the back of the head will keep you awake during the popping sequence.
3. Open bag carefully--please avoid escaping worms.
Now I know what happened to the old dot matrix printer from my high school computer science lab!
...or, when the bag is opened, all your popcorn will fall out!
So what exactly is that "popcorn" button on the microwave for, Orville?
Like an infant or toddler can read this anyway!
This is clearly a lie. I opened up a brand-new unpopped bag when I got back from the store, and found neither hot oil nor steam inside...
...in case we forgot to cover something.
Why does it matter which way the bag is facing when we take the plastic off?
After that, it's anyone's guess...
