Al Qaeda Releases "Greatest Threats" DVD Box Set Today
In a move predicted to generate millions of dollars for their holy war against America, the radical Islamist group al Qaeda has compiled a DVD box set of some of their most chilling televised messages broadcast to date.
"All your favorites are here--Bin Laden, Zarqawi, al Zawahiri and more! If they have ever wiggled a bony index finger in the air while shouting 'Death To America,' they are on this video," stated a masked al Qaeda operative who threatened to chop off all our heads here at The Defiant Salmon if we ever revealed his true identity.
"We noticed how popular these speeches were on YouTube, and figured we would get in on the action," said the masked al Qaeda militant. "In addition, there are bloopers, outtakes, and extended rants as well on this three-disc compilation."
"One of my favorite clips on the DVD is the one where Osama's turban keeps unraveling during a recent taping. The look on his face is priceless."
Amazon.com reports that sales of the DVD set have been brisk, but also that many copies are being returned with quality issues. "Basically, it looks like these discs were all burned on a laptop in some cave in Afghanistan during a sandstorm or something," reported an Amazon employee who begged not to be identified.
"Still, we are recommending that our customers write only positive reviews for the package on our site, if they know what is good for them."
"All your favorites are here--Bin Laden, Zarqawi, al Zawahiri and more! If they have ever wiggled a bony index finger in the air while shouting 'Death To America,' they are on this video," stated a masked al Qaeda operative who threatened to chop off all our heads here at The Defiant Salmon if we ever revealed his true identity.
"We noticed how popular these speeches were on YouTube, and figured we would get in on the action," said the masked al Qaeda militant. "In addition, there are bloopers, outtakes, and extended rants as well on this three-disc compilation."
"One of my favorite clips on the DVD is the one where Osama's turban keeps unraveling during a recent taping. The look on his face is priceless."
Amazon.com reports that sales of the DVD set have been brisk, but also that many copies are being returned with quality issues. "Basically, it looks like these discs were all burned on a laptop in some cave in Afghanistan during a sandstorm or something," reported an Amazon employee who begged not to be identified.
"Still, we are recommending that our customers write only positive reviews for the package on our site, if they know what is good for them."
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